Batman v Superman Review


How we saw the film…’Batman versus Superman starts off initially as a whose-manhood-is-bigger competition. Somewhere in the film after a few manhood swings later, they share a quasi homosexual moment where Batman has the capped crusader pinned on the ground with his man boots. Eventually the two kiss and make up when they discover at that moment both their mothers have the same name, Martha. With this new found friendship the two embark on taking Lex Luther down only to discover that the prepubescent sociopath has created a monster that can’t be destroyed using normal nukes (or a makeover)…Washington nukes the damn thing making it stronger….oh Uncle Sam *facepalm*. Face to face with the doomsday monster a scantily dressed woman who looks like Wonder Woman shows up. She appears to get off sexually from fighting the monster smiling as it beats and throws her half way across the city. Eventually the monster gets defeated…*Yay!* But for being a goodie two shoes Superman suffers consequences. I mean he could’ve just as easily thrown the spear…In the end the world is safe once more *surprise surprise* albeit looking like a demolition site and we’re left to wonder one thing…..when can we see Wonder Woman again?


By Alexandr Mendez


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